They sing this song, "Who Am I", and I love the lyrics. All about how in the grand scheme of things we are nothing. The world is so much bigger than our small problems. The first time I heard this song was in high school in chapel, when a girl sang it. She had a beautiful voice, and after I heard it, I had to figure out who sang it.
I need to meet more friends who share my faith. I'm feeling really lonely lately.
I had someone I considered a good friend. She was supposed to come and visit over break. We had made plans, or I thought we had. She never called, never came over. She has always been flaky... not someone who is too aware of time and being dependable. But she has not had time for me in months. I have been shoving it off, trying to ignore the fact that someone I care about cannot make time for me at all....
It hurts.
She was someone who I could talk about God with, my struggles and someone with strong faith when I needed a reminder of how awesome God is.
She does not know that I have a job.
That's how long it's been since I talked to her. Because when I stopped calling and sending her facebook notes and letters in the mail, she never got a hold of me.
I'm on pinterest all the time now, because it's addicting and I have time on my hands until my training starts... and there is good advice on there.... like this:
So my question is: as someone who always wants closure, how do you tell (or not tell) someone that you don't really trust them anymore, because they are never even involved in your life? So much so that you have not talked to them in over a month, and after months of being unemployed, they don't even know that you had an interview, went back for another interview, and then got a job offer the next day....
They do not have a clue what is going on in my life because they didn't even bother to ask. Or call, or write, or freaking facebook message me or anything else.
Then I feel like a horrible person because I'm so upset by this... betrayal. That's what it feels like to me. Every time I open up to someone else and let them in they leave. I want people to know me, the real me, and I want to know them too. But it's so hard to be friends with someone who doesn't want to be friends with you. Someone who refuses to put in any effort in a relationship. Don't I deserve better?
Don't we all deserve to be friends with people who actually put an effort into your relationship? It's the same thing with guys, but that's a topic for another day.
It takes two people to have a relationship, and one person should not be doing all of the work.
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